Here I Go Again

I am officially a full-fledged University student, AGAIN. It's crazy. I feel crazy, well, not so much anymore now that I've had my first classes. I'm feeling more of that hopeful strength that comes from putting one foot in front of another as I walk in darkness. Each step shows the tiniest bit of light in front.

I started on Friday night with Human Development. This is a 3 1/2 hour class that will end in about 10 weeks. This feels a lot like many of the other classes I've already taken (15 years ago) for my Health degree. In two weeks I'll do a 15 minute class presentation with a partner on Death and the stages of Grief. I know something about this. I'm confident. My partner is my new friend. We're going to rock.

The not so touchy-feely class I have is Chemistry on Saturday mornings for 5 1/4 hours. This I'm not sure how I'm going to get through. Well, actually, I know exactly how I'm going to get through it. Blood, Sweat and Tears. I've already read the first two chapters and tried to teach myself the homework. Most of it is math. MATH! It's a four-letter word you know. My calculator has become attached to me as I divide and multiply fractions, remember scientific notation, calculate significant figures, determine the mass number...I'm only half-way through Chapter two. The teacher is already reminding me that this is the EASY stuff.

In order to get into UVU Nursing School I have to get all A's and take several more science classes, including Anatomy and Physiology that I took 18 years ago and got B- in both. "Oh, yes, now I remember why I didn't try this the first time."

So, here I go, one step at a time. Just putting one foot in front of another. My days of being a stay-at-home mom and swim coach are coming to a close. Yes, I know something of grief. It's not ALWAYS a physical death that brings it. I hope this transition will be smooth and gentle for all of us.

Lord, please help us. No. I mean, Thank You for helping us. I KNOW You have been. And...please, Please, PLEASE stay with me. I need all the help I can get.

Little Wild Horse Canyon

I love to try new things! When I get to do something I've never done before I'm happy. And I've been really wanting some happy lately.
This has got to be one of the coolest hikes I've ever been on. Too bad I didn't get any pictures of the kids, or adults, maneuvering hands on one side of the canyon and feet on the other side.

A few spots had water that we carried the kids over. For the most part the kids didn't even know they were hiking as long as they were bouldering over rocks and climbing in narrow crevices.

Our neighbors have 6 kids, the husband is taking the picture and he must have the baby on his back, so those are the two not in the picture. I would NEVER have been able to do this without them. And I'm SO GLAD we did. Overall it ended up an 8 mile hike, whew! The kids really did love it. I'm in heaven, still. We didn't really plan to be on vacation together, but this family was at the same campground we were. They came over to our site and we roasted hot dogs and marshmallows together. I don't even want to go hiking or camping now unless we can invite some friends along. They are the reason we could do this awesome hike. I don't think I could say thank you enough for letting us come along, and then carrying us when we needed it most.

April Fool's

If you can't read it because it's too small, I'll tell you what it says. Basically, he wrote me a note from detention saying how he got in trouble at school. After getting big high fives from his Dad and brother saying "way to give a 6th grader a bloody nose" he couldn't keep the secret any longer and just said, "April Fool's!" I have to admit it never crossed my mind that he was playing a joke on me.

Some evidence that we might be good parents after all

Connor started taking piano in January. (Breanne started taking lessons too, but I pulled her out this month with the hope of starting again in the Fall. Hopefully by then she'll be able to concentrate longer and be willing to practice regularly, *fingers crossed*.)

Anyway. Connor is progressing so well with piano. I am absolutely delighted with his progress! He practices consistently with little prodding. He's learning to read music and this week started playing with both hands at the same time. He loves it because his teacher gives him a chocolate for every song he passes off. Oh, the power of rewards!

Yesterday when he was practicing piano I found him adding some two-handed scales to his practice. His teacher hasn't assigned them, but he's doing them anyway. When he added the metronome I was especially impressed. Then, it occurred to me. He's been listening to me practice piano. (Yes, I've started taking lessons from a neighbor in trade for swimming lessons. It's great and we both get something we want.) The beauty of it, to me though, is to see directly how MY practicing scales with the metronome rubbed off on Connor. He was mimicking me in a good way. I couldn't be more proud.

What a great kid. That wasn't the only example, either. Connor mimicked Ross this week when he chose Gandhi for his biography book report that is due later this month. Ross has been reading a couple of books titled, Gandhi, that he picked up at the library. I think it was just something Ross wanted to learn about. Connor, I think, wants to learn about what his parents are learning about. I was surprised he didn't pick one of his favorite presidents, or a famous athlete, even Michael Phelps.

I'm also feeling suddenly so proud, and grateful, and powerful that we are having what appears to be a good influence as parents. I thought all these kids just did what ever they wanted regardless of how hard I tried.

And apparently, it's the NOT trying that seems to have influence. Who knew that developing ourselves in simple ways could be so powerful?

What else should I be doing? Wait, don't answer that!

The Talent Show Dilemma

Breanne has a dilemma.

Next week during music class she has a talent show. The flyer that came home says she can play the piano, or another instrument, tell a joke, show a picture or craft of her own making, bring in a certificate of something she's accomplished, or even show a home video or dvd of her participating in something, like training the family pet.

The possiblities abound--but that's the problem. She even told me. "I have so many talents I just don't know what I'm going to share." I found her awake at 9:30 pm putting the finishing touches on her unique artwork.

"Yes, that's true. You do have SO MANY talents. I'm not sure what you're going to share either, sweetheart, but you'll have to think about it while your sleeping and get some rest."

Can you promise to have this problem when you're in 6th grade?

February around here

We celebrated Connor's birthday at home with a cake and also to the movies to watch Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief. Connor was disappointed that the makers of the movie did not follow the book more closely. I thought the changes in the movie were interesting changes, and that overall it was a fun adventure show for boys.

Connor's been playing basketball thanks to the extra help Dave has been giving him teaching him on Fridays to dribble and shoot. I can tell he's improved a ton in the last month that he's been playing. Of course I couldn't get any of my action photos to show up, but if I do then I'll be sure to post pictures.

This was the heart shape pizza Ross made for Valentine's day. It was a huge success. I see a new tradition here. I can't believe we haven't been doing this for the kids for years.

Snow What Fun--It's a Party!

I put the last picture first. This is the pizza once we came home after sledding.
A friend, Andrew, on top of the world.

Taking a break with doughnuts and hot chocolate.

Aidan and Carson build a snowman.

This is me mostly trying to get a picture of the beautiful background these kids are playing in.

Even Collin enjoyed himself.

That's a steep hill. (The reason my thrill seeker picked this activity for a party.)

Getting our sleds ready.

The helmet helps her feel safer while sledding.

We are kings of the mountain.

My favorite 9 year old birthday boy.


This was the funnest sledding party I've ever thrown. Of course, it's my first, but I feel confident that I could do it again if necessary. The boys were all gentlemen and thrill seekers combined. They played together well, even though they didn't all know each other. A few friends from school, a few from the neighborhood and a one from swim team.

We survived the 1/2 hour drive up and 1/2 hour drive down the canyon, where I learned that boys may be every bit as chatty as girls.

We ate lots of doughnuts and drank hot chocolate.

Pizza once we came home kept everyone happy

and at the end they had a chance to win a candy bar in the game.

I'm feeling confident that I know how to keep boys happy at least for a few hours.

Plenty of Food and outdoor Fun. Hopefully Connor's feeling the love.

Definitely a great day.

Church Today and other rambling

Breanne gave a talk in Primary today. "Our Daily Bread" is a flannel board story from the library that we picked up. It's a simple story about graditude. Simple stories really are the best ones, right?

I don't have any amazing or extraordiaray news about how she memorized the whole thing. She didn't. In fact she had long pauses sometimes between ideas and some of her words were difficult to understand because she either spoke too close to the mic or too fast. Still, I sat in the back smiling ear to ear, so happy to see my little girl giving her best. She was confident and happy. The same way she does everything.

Collin wore his new sweater vest to pass the sacrament. I think it's a men's size M. Someone at church commented to me that he looks "just like his father." Yes. He does, only with red hair. Collin was putting dishes away this week and told me that he can reach the top shelf now, when last week he couldn't. He's shooting up and is officially taller than his mom. I'll take a picture soon.

Connor likes to sit right next to me at sacrament and cuddle with me. It's really sweet and I love it. He started basketball yesterday, and has a game practically every Sat. from now through the middle of March. Dave, Esta's husband, has agreed to take him to all of his games. Whew! I have a swimming meet this Sat. and it's tough to be in two places at once. Connor could have been at the meet too, but since basketball season doesn't last forever and swimming season does, I'm letting it go. I suppose if Dave has his way Connor will be a basketball star. I wouldn't complain, since bball can be more fun to watch than swimming.

That reminds me, Connor and Breanne went with me on Friday night to BYU vs. TCU swim meet. We had a great time and then went to get shakes after at the creamery. Collin and his dad stayed home to read books. Wonder if they'll ever understand that they're missing out? Watching swimming isn't for everyone, I guess. Then again, if I got bball tickets I'm not certain they'd want to come either. Hmm? I think maybe I'll look into getting some. I bet we'd have a ton of fun.

Collin's Idea

Collin told me last night he has an idea. He doesn't want his dad and I to stay married just because it's what is best for him, Connor, and Breanne. Instead he wants us to have a good relationship.

Apparently, I said something recently either to him or in front of him that let him know that is why we are still together. I think it may have been the day before Fast Sunday when I encouraged them to fast for their dad and/or me so that we could keep it together.

When he mentioned it last night before bed Iwondered if I shouldn't have ever said anything. Is this a topic too big for a little boy to carry?

Notice, though, that he didn't say we should get divorced either. He just wants us to WANT to be married to each other.

I remember being a kid and wanting that too.