My Daughter the Fashion Designer

I really should have taken a picture of this. I think at the time, though, I was in much too deep of denial. I tried to get her to put her clothes on the right way for Sunday. Well, truthfully, I didn't try that hard.

Breanne wore the sweater over her dress in a "fashionable" way to church on Sunday. Instead of putting her neck through the opening for her head she put the whole front of the sweater behind her so only the sleeves were on the right way. The sweater then was draped behind her instead of being on her chest. She got away with it too. It looked "fashionalble." If her hair didn't cover the neck whole in her back it would have been problem, but it did.

She reminds me daily that when she turns 8 grandma will teach her to sew. I guess she and Ross were talking about it the other day. She mentioned that she would learn how to do blankets, and she couldn't wait. And Ross, said, "What about clothes? Do you want to learn to sew clothes too?" He said her eyes got wide with excitement as the idea started to form in her head, because this was a new discovery. And she said, "Yes!"

The Things We Say -- Another lesson on the power of words

Have you ever overheard people talking about you?

It happened to me this morning.

I went to the bathroom stall at the rec. center this morning after my workout on the eliptical. I had forgotten that Masters swimming had just gotten out and the ladies were in there changing.

For the last two Fridays and several times last year I've been the substitute coach for Masters swimming.

Today I heard, "What Jenn taught me last Friday really helped me with my stroke." Another lady said, "I know, I'm so glad Jenn's been coaching us on Friday." And another lady said, "Yea, she's really good." "It's been great to have the mix of coaching."

I smiled all the way home today. And now that I've written it down I can hardly help from smiling.

I knew these ladies appreciated me. They've told me before. But somehow catching them talking good about me feels like a gift from God.

Yes, I think it is.

Lights on Temple Square

We went to "We Also Sing" concert in the tabernacle. It was really fun be together and listen to songs about Jesus and Love and Joy. Ross and I both really liked that they performed Christmas songs that we'd never actually heard. It was refreshing. How come I don't take more pictures of Breanne? Her life is always a party and if I had pictures of everything she does I would remember that.

Graham Cracker Houses

Let the Festivities Begin.

Christmas has officially begun.

A day with cousins is a good day!

Creativity abounds!

We got an early start his year on a fun holiday tradition--Graham Craker Houses. When we asked the kids if they wanted to do this again, we got a loud chorus of agreement. All the kids like to do it for the creative outlet. Just as many like to do it so they can eat candy.

Each of my kids ate theirs before dinner.

I coached swimming this morning, so I missed the doorbuster sales. That's not new seeing how I've never once in my life tried to shop on Black Friday. I was intrigued this year, but decided I needed to have more money in order to save as much as I'd like. After swim practice at 7am I met Courtney and Lindsay at Target just for fun and to take a peek at the crowds. If Lindsay hadn't cut in line at the check out we would have been there for 2 more hours.

That afternoon we checked out the Walmart in Cedar Hills, and we were so pleasantly surprised to get a few great deals that had not been sold out.

It was a great day!

Happy Thanksgiving

I took a few minutes to be thankful as I made potatoes, and sweet potatoes today. I decided on butter. I'm thankful for butter, and all the yummy food I ate that is made with it.

Grandma and Papa brought rolls, stuffing, and fruit salad.

Ross made the perfect turkey...again. He's become quite good at this. Did I mention that I'm thankful for Alton Brown?

Uncle Kevin brought the pies. He also played Magic cards with the boys, who were excited enough to buy their own sets of cards that they washed baseboards yesterday and asked what else they could do to earn money. Yes, I'm even thankful for Magic cards (if something motivates my kids, heck yes, I'm thankful for it).

Today I was thankful for a working oven, and the friends who came over and fixed it. I'm thankful for the new faucet my Dad installed when he came to visit in May. I'm grateful for the new dishwasher that's washing all the dishes (ever so quietly) while I write.

This is Connor, who peeled 65 minutes of extra computer time in potatoes. I told all the kids they could have 5 minutes of computer or video games for every potato peeled. Connor did them all. That was perfectly ok with the other two children who are not pictured.

We took turns expressing gratitude around the dinner table today. It's unanioumous. We are thankful for Family!

Our Christmas Card This Year

Before blogging and facebook I used to send out Christmas cards. I don't do that anymore. Now (theoretically) I keep in touch with people I love all year round. Instead of sending out family photos you can look at the blog side bar or just click on my facebook profile and see recent and old pictures.

But, I used to send out greetings about how good my life was and why everyone should be jealous of my awesome life and my amazingly talented, and very good looking children.

Now I know better. Well, hopefully I'm learning.

This has been (I know everyone already knows) a really hard year.

Recently at Time Out For Women in Salt Lake. Wendy Watson Nelson (wife of Elder Nelson) spoke about what she wished was on her Christmas card. And she said it wouldn't be all that flowery foo-foo that she was tired of reading in her friends' cards. It comes instead from the words of the apostle Paul in 2 Corinthians 4:8-9.

I hope you'll consider this your Christmas card as well.

8 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
9 Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;

Like Paul we know where to look for redemption and we continue to put our faith (in the best way we know how) in Jesus. God Bless. Wishing you the best in your journey as well.

Happy Halloween (more pictures)

I'm not sure you can see it in these pictures, but, Breanne already has candy stuck in her hair. Great way to start out, huh?

Mom, I finally know what I'm going to be. I'm going to attach cereal boxes to my shirt and be a "cereal" killer.

His sign says, "You're next Cheerios."

I'm surprised he opted for the spoon instead of some sort of great weapon. But, I'm also very glad.

Happy Halloween

School party.

Witchy Poo.

The themed birthday cake I'm so proud of. Reese's pieces on chocolate ARE really good.



Happy Birthday girl!

Is It Just Me?: Parent /Teacher/ Entire World Conferences. But It's Private, So It's OK.

Is It Just Me?: Parent /Teacher/ Entire World Conferences. But It's Private, So It's OK.

This was an interesting blog post about one mom's experience because of our new world technology.

Truth is guys internet is here to stay. Facebook actually blesses my life all the time. And the kids are going to use it (making our lives more and more transparent) whether we like it or not.

As much as I'd like to hide my head in the sand and shelter my kids from every media, or social media experience I can see that in the next few years it may no longer be possible.

What's a gal to do?

"Like Powdered Sugar on Brownies"

It's the season's first sprinkling of snow and this is how Collin described what he saw. He wasn't trying to be flowery, or anything. It was just what came to mind when he saw the mountains ahead of us.

But to me his description of the mountain was so much more. It was the epitome of this boy that I struggle to understand. This boy that has his head in books... This boy who would rather read a book at recess than play with friends...This boy who works best when listening to a book...This boy who has been referred to by his teachers as the "walking dictionary."

In that moment I saw him as so much more than all of that.

I saw him as an emerging author, a great thinker, a natural. He's a talented kid, and his mom doesn't always recognize that. I took a moment to let him know I really like the way he thinks. I don't do that often enough.

Of course, the only other explanation, is that he just thinks of nature in terms of food.

Hey, there's gotta be some genius in that! And we haven't even seen the meatballs from the sky movie, yet.

Which is the bigger miracle?

The tooth fairy came to my house on the same night a child lost her tooth? (For the last year or so it seems like the tooth fairy has always gotten lost on the way here, arriving a day or two late and often remembering, I mean, finding the tooth, several days after it was orginally placed under the pillow.)

Or...

The fact that I took clean, sparkling dishes out of my brand new dishwasher after over a year of trying to revive the broken one?

Either way. Something is right today!

A Proud Mom Moment

Today I was touched by the sincerity and strength of my 8-year old son. Here are just a few of his words from his talk today in Primary. His topic was fasting, and his testimony of this principle is personal and sincere.

He talked about how fasting without prayer is starving. He also shared a scripture in Matthew 6:16-18. Then he gave his personal example and testimony. He does not doubt the existence of God or His awareness of him.

"Since I was baptized in February, I’ve tried to fast on Fast Sunday. During that time I have also prayed very hard for my family. My mom explained to me that Heavenly Father doesn’t always answer our prayers in the way we want. I have been praying for my mom and dad and I have fasted for them. I know that my fasting has blessed my family. Heavenly Father answers my prayers. I feel very grateful.
I want to end by bearing my testimony…
I believe the church is true. I know Heavenly Father answers my prayers. It has happened almost immediately for me. I know that President Monson is a true prophet and that it’s the right thing to listen to him. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen."

I was especially grateful for a phone call tonight from one of the primary teachers who heard Connor speak. He wanted me to know that he was touched by the sincerity of his talk and that he too knew that God had answered his prayers. Connor smiled from ear to ear as we listened to the message. And so we relive this moment over and over. A small proud mom moment worth remembering.

X-Rays

Here are the x-rays from Breanne's fall before the Dr. put the bones back into place. The left arm, L, she is holding her hand with the palm facing her so the top bone hides the broken bone underneath. It does give you a good picture of how displaced the bone was.

The right arm x-ray is palm down, so you can see both broken bones.

Broken Moores on the Mend

One of my girlfriends who was out of town for church last week said, "I heard you and Ross were sitting together again at church." To which I had to reply, "It's not just a rumor. It's true."

I have another friend who asks me almost daily, "I saw Ross' car here again. How are you guys doing?"

The truth, "There is a lot of pain, and I'm not sure how we are really going to make this work but, today again, so far so good." The other truth, "Things have changed a ton for the better. It's awesome!"

"It sounds like you are cautiously optimistic." So I guess that describes it.

I have heard each of the children pray either separately or together, "Thank you that mommy and daddy are back together."

My prayers are full of gratitude too--and continual pleas for guidance and help. Perhaps like it should be, that hasn't changed a whole lot.

Our Junk Yard Visit

We did it! We made our first ever trip to the junk yard. The story is now complete.

Sometime after Collin ripped the old visor off I got good advice from a friend not to go to the dealer for a new one. Going to the junk yard wasn't something I was looking forward to, in fact, I came really close to pawning this responsiblity off to Papa or anyone else willing to take it.

Someone suggested, though, that I may benefit just as much as Collin by doing the hard thing that I didn't really want to do. So off we went today to face our fear, rise to the challenge, complete the story together. You get the idea. (Did I build the drama well enough?)

The irony. Collin picked a visor from the driver side instead of the passenger side and I let him. Well, I argued with him some, but we were both ready to have this over with. I didn't think it would be the right shape, but it fits. The mirror unfortunately won't face out so that you can use it. When the visor is up the mirror faces the ground, and when the visor is down the mirror faces the windshield. I can't decide if he got his $16 worth or not.

So maybe I get a C- today. I guess with a few A days and a few C days it all rounds out to about B+ anyway, don't you think?

Snapshot in words from the kids this weekend

At dinner when Connor, who has plenty of ketchup, but is about to pour more on his plate...
Me: You don't need any more ketchup. You only have two tater tots left.
Connor: Yes, but I have 5 fingers.



Breanne listening to the radio in the car.
Bree: Singing and dancing really make me feel happy.



Collin about visiting the Christi McAuliff Space Center overnight camp.
Collin: I guess most of the people who really like this stuff are geeks and nerds. I don't care because it's the coolest thing EVER!

Mine too, Honey, Mine Too

I was cleaning off the desk today and found one of Breanne's kindergarten pictures that I was going to file, but still haven't gotten around to doing it. I may file it, but I'm scanning it first. My heart aches that summer is basically over. I'll add this here as part of my grieving process.

Sliding Rock

These are just a few pictures that highlight my littlest adventurerer.
We're ready to back with friends again soon.
If anyone is game, just let me know.
The water is mountain run off. It's absolutely freezing.
Not an activity for the faint of heart.
And so much fun!

On the Motherhood Test Today I Just Got an A

It was one of those tests where my oldest son threw an ugly fit because he wasn't ready for school in time. As his panic increased so did his rage.



Rewind to Friday when I went to a few classes at BYU education week.
Joy and Gary Lundberg re-taught me something I was able to practice this morning.



1. Validate their feelings.

2. Establish the boundary with kindness, gentleness, love, and firmness.



Me: You sound pretty frustrated that you're not ready for school.

Child (screaming at me): Yea, well you're FINALLY noticing.

Me: Sounds like you're really having a tough time?

Child (sreaming at me): Duh, mom!? I'm not going to school now. Throwing his bike onto the driveway.

Me: (saying a silent prayer. Please help me to say the right things. I didn't get angry or yell at him. I actually genuinely felt sorry for him not getting a good start to his day.) If I drive you to school, you'll have to walk home because you won't have your bike. Is that what you want to do?



This child continued to rage and fume. I stayed calm, loving, and sympathetic.



Infact, you know what the Lundbergs said on Friday? They said that when you establish a clear boundary it gets worse before it gets better. They told stories that taught this well. Now I have one of my own.



Once in the car he broke his pencil and then pulled the sun visor out of the car ceiling, ruining the van. I was shocked but I said very lovingly, "Wow that will cost a lot of money to fix." I resisted the urge to say anything else.



Do you understand how monumnetal this is? Today I didn't yell. I was kind and loving. I was gentle AND firm. It's like the coming together of years of reading books, going to seminars, and classes.



Oh, yes I know there will be more tests. I'm just not ready to move on to those until I celebrate this one.

First Day of School

Summer is officially over. All my children are in school the whole day. It's Collin's birthday. Wow, it's a big day.

Things I'm Thankful For

I think I ought to counter that last post with one that reminds me and everyone who might read this, that I am actually thankful for so many things.

I'm really not always overwhelmed, sad, or pessimistic. In fact, even though I've had a very busy summer working many more hours than I think I "should" I am capable of looking on the bright side of things.

Today in fact, I'm thankful for things I didn't even remember to be grateful for last week.
Take the van, I drive, for example. After a week of charging the battery nearly everytime I wanted to go somewhere, today I finally got a new battery. Now every time I get in the car it starts all by itself. I'm grateful!

I'm grateful that I have a bike I could ride to work this morning. I'm grateful that my body was healthy enough to make that happen.

I'm thankful for good people in my life who call at "just the right time" and friends who are willing to help watch the kids when I need it most. I don't mean to get teary eyed while I write this, but in the last several months I've had so many people care for me. Their kindness overwhelms me. I have such a desire to be cared for and they remind me that I am.

I'm thankful to have a job that I enjoy and people who appreciate the things I do.

And despite that last post, I'm thankful that I have 3 great kids. I remember a time before I had children when I wanted so much just to be a mom. It's good for me even now to remember that deep longing and desire I had. That's when I'm sad that I've not done better, but that's not what this post is about.

This post is just about being grateful for the things I sometimes forget to be grateful for. There are so many.

I had one of those Sundays...

when I think not trying so hard would be a lot better.

I know, I have nothing to complain about. I have not forgotten how hard it was to take a newborn baby, a two-year old, and a five-year old to church. That was six years ago. I remember being exhausted, but I especially remember wanting a rest on Sunday. There was no rest. Sunday was just harder than other days.

I remember a year later when Connor and Breanne were both in nursery and I was their nursery leader. I was exhuasted, especially on Sunday. Yes, I needed a nap after church. I remember thinking, "Some day these kids will all be able to put their own shoes on and buckle themselves in the car, and then I will not be so tired."

Someday has come. Not only can they all get their own shoes on, they can all walk to and from church with little supervision. But, I have not succeeded yet, in teaching them how to open the door for others when they walk into the building, or in how to sit quietly in the meeting. I'm still using that, "I'm so tired" excuse.

It doesn't mean I don't put SOME effort into teach them.

Like today, when I told them they will not be getting up and going out for drinks and to the bathroom 400 times during the course of the meeting. Instead, I announced that if they want to leave sacrament today in order to get a drink or to go the bathroom they would lose 10 moolah points. They had the choice, but there would also be a consequence. The kids have been earning moolah points for doing their jobs. I learned all about it from my friend, Corinne, from this website http://www.goalforit.com/. For two of my kids it works pretty well. For my one child who has run ins with the principal at school, it's been much harder.

So I should have known that this wonderful child would start to blow his nose into his hand during the meeting. I let it go the first few times until people's stares started making holes in my back. I finally said, "Go get a tissue" much too loudly. He retorted much louder, "I can't. I don't want to lose my moolah." Before he finally left, he wiped his snot on his sister's leg and she poked him with her pencil.

Gotta love Sunday!

Might as Well Be Christmas

Today Connor woke up before 6am, was dressed and had breakfast by 6:05. He didn't even need to meet at the church until 6:30 but he wanted to have time to get ready. Do you think he's a little anxious? Today is cub scout day camp. His first ever opportunity to do archery, and a whole host of other boy activities that may include fishing, sling shot, bb gun shooting--you get the idea. Like I said it may as well be Christmas.

Is this even the same kid who has been waking up sometime around 10am for the past several weeks?

I can't help remembering several weeks ago when I went to wake Connor for an early Saturday morning swim meet around 6:30am only to find him snoring through his alarm. I felt sorry for him and left him home to rest.

He was determined not to let that happen to him today. Have fun sweetie!

Take Care of Yourself

I have a friend that I visit that leaves me with the same words every time I walk out of her office. I imagine its the same with everyone she visits.

She always says...Take Care of Yourself.

It's not trite or quick. In fact it's exactly the opposite. She says it more like a plea. Love and concern are evident with each word. Take Care of Yourself.

I don't think I noticed it the first few times we met, but as our visits became more frequent I realized it's the same every time. Take Care of Yourself.

Depending on how I'm doing it means something different. In my mind it's basic. She must mean:
Excercise, Eat well, Sleep enough--but not too much, Pray, and Search wisdom (scriptures etc.) Right?

Take Care of Yourself.

Laugh. Love. Work. Play. Have fun.

Defining it almost makes it seem trite, but it's not. It's just different depending on what it means that day.

Take Care of Yourself.

If my children's whinning could kill me, I'd be dead.

I started the day telling my son, that he "can do hard things." He insisted that he only wanted to do EASY things and he wanted to have nothing to do with hard things. In my mind I just felt sorry for him. "What kind of adult will he grow into if he never does hard things?" I try motivating him with things he may want. I try taking away privileges he enjoys. He insists on being unmotivated. I get that I have to be consistent. I know this from experience, because if I can be consistent it will pay off.

As I was fighting with myself in my head about what consistency looks like and how to proceed I could only think about how much I'd really like to wake up tomorrow "a better parent." Could I please be magically transformed into someone who knew what I was doing? Could I just be patient, kind, and consistent. Could I hold my kids accountable for every choice they make and not waiver? "Can it PLEASE be easy?"

That's when the irony of the whole thing hit me. What kind of kid will HE be if he doesn't want to do hard things? Exactly like me. In fact, I'm thinking of just quitting too. The biggest problem with that is that I know better.

I have forgotten what it's like to be a kid

That's not an entirely a bad thing, after all I have to be the responsible one who makes sure we all survive etc. Yet, I'm not sure it's an entirely good thing either. I have this memory of sitting in the back seat of the car and saying to my mom, "When I'm grown up I'm never going to forget what it feels like to be a kid."

I felt misunderstood, and unimportant. I was sure that as soon as I was old enough to be in charge of myself things would be great because I could call the shots, and make my own decisions. I would finally have things the WAY I WANTED! That's funny now, but not to my kid mind, it wasn't.

One of the things that reminds me that I don't think like a kid anymore:
My daughter sleeps in her swimming suit so that she'll have it on ready to go in the morning.

I don't know an adult alive who would be comfortable sleeping with those straps boring into their shoulders.

Of course I totally did that! "So I can be ready in time."

From Jed in Iraq--An image from the Old Testament

Jeremiah 17:5-8

5 Thus saith the Lord; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the Lord.

6 For he shall be like the heath in the desert, and shall not see when good cometh; but shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness, in a salt land and not inhabited.

7 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is.

8 For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit.

Above is picture of a heath. This little plant is a member of the Juniper family and is exactly what Jeremiah is referring to. Notice the heavy salt stains on the earth behind the plant. My mom's husband Jed has been working in Iraq for the last 20 months. He sent this post in an email yesterday along with the picture he took. I liked it so much I asked to post it here too.

He doesn't have this post up on his blog yet, but here is the address that includes some of his adventures.
-- Visit http://jedmail.blogspot.com/

The Words We Say--Part 2

Success!

People have tried for a long time to define success. What is it? How do you achieve it? When do you know you're there?

Well, I can now answer all of those questions with the following incident:

At dinner this evening my children all said something they appreciated either about one of their siblings or about me. In fact, after the initial brainstorming, they were thanking each other for little kindnesses they remembered receiving earlier in the day. "Thank you for coming to check on me when I fell on my bike," he said to his brother. He was sincere, gracious, thoughtful, and kind.

My hope for the future has been rekindled. My efforts at teaching were rewarded. And for a moment we all knew without a doubt that the words we use are powerful forces for good.

I remember hearing somewhere that motherhood happens in moments. This was exactly that-- a moment of success, and it was GLORIOUS!

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones...

...But Words Will Never Hurt Me.

I remember at a very young age, complaining to my mom that the kids in the neighborhood were making fun of me. My very first memory of getting my feelings hurt from being called names came before I had even turned 4. I cried to my mom, "They called me Jennifer Jones with Mickey Mouse Bones." I sobbed.

My mom laughed. After all I was her first child and while she tried to console me, it was obviously funny to her. She told me to go back out there and say, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." That's exactly what I did and I meant it! I've believed it since. Words are just words, right?

Well. I'm not so sure anymore.

Words are very powerful for both good and evil. For example, when I get a call from the principal that my son says rude things to authority figures, that's a problem!

So far the only solution I could come up with is to have him do what I had to do in Jr. High. Write 100 sentences. "I will speak respectfully, especially to adults" (Only I wrote 1000 sentences--I will not throw things on the school bus. I'm sure it wasn't really my fault, I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time--I digress.)

How important are words? The only thing I can come up with is, if someone hurts you with them, shake it off--just words. If your child, on the other hand becomes a delinquent because he started out as a disrespectful punk and never grew out of it--Pray, I guess.

I got this advice from a friend and I've tried it too. We are going to play some games at home where we say things in certain ways and see if it always has the same meaning. He likes this already, especially when he gets to practice saying, I love you, sarcastically.

Maybe instead of writing sentences I should have him record his voice in a variety of pleasant tones. Hmm? If I'm looking for torture that would do it for sure.

Glitter Toes

Despite the bike grease on my leg I really do enjoy being a girly girl from time to time. Especially with the help of my sisters. It was so nice to have them in town if only for a day or two.

I learned something this weekend. Getting a group of women together to have glitter painted toes is almost as much fun as a bunch of women getting together for a triathlon or any other exercise class.

Maybe the activity isn't as important as the encouragement, strength, and support we give each other.

Carrots for Breakfast--Best Mother's Day Present Ever

I don't normally eat carrots for breakfast, but today I ate the best carrots ever. They were brought to me on a tray w/ oranges, pancakes, yogurt and granola and a tall glass of milk. The kids brought me breakfast in bed. It was very thoughtful and extremely well done. Especially when you take into account the fact that Connor can hardly feed himself. More on that here.

The carrots especially made an impression on me. Maybe they really were listening when I said you should have vegetables at every meal.

Now that's a Mother's Day present every one wants!

Mother of the Year

I had this sent to my sister's and mom for Mother's Day.

Here's the link.

Broken Moores

One of the problems with keeping a family blog updated is that families have things happen that are really no one else's business. Kinda like this.

So, I'll keep it short.

The IronMoores are the BrokenMoores.

We've been a bit broken for awhile. Now, it's a little more official. Ross is staying with his parents. We hope we'll get it together again soon. We're working on some stuff.

Thanks for all your prayers and support. I've felt uplifted by everyone's help, and believe me I need it. Plus, I appreciate it so much.

Here's to hoping that this separation (with the help of professional counseling) will be the best thing for our family!

Hello Failure, My Old Friend

Ok, so the song is really Hello Darkness My Old Friend, which works too, for the mood I'm in right now. I woke up with this Simon & Garfunkel song in my head this morning. Just that line.

I had a job interview on Friday for a teaching job at a nearby Jr. High starting in the Fall. I got an email later that afternoon that the job had been filled. They didn't pick me. They wanted somebody else.

I had even talked myself into believing I wanted that job!

I've been feeling crushed this weekend, like that was my ONE LAST HOPE, and now it's OVER. Yes, I'm being dramatic. Part of it has to do with my fear of failure.

How many times have I shied away from things because I've been paralyzed with fear that I wouldn't be good enough? "I won't do it right. I'll screw it up. I'm not even going to try." Ask my sister who tried to teach me how to quilt. I'm worse than my kids sometimes at giving up if I'm not very good at something. I wonder where they get it from?

Well, that's the old me and I'm starting new.

Now I look failure in the face daily and say, "Hello, my old friend. I'm not scared of you anymore."

How does the quote go? "It's not how many times you fall, but how many times you get up that matters?" Don't let me fool you. I'm really sick of trying to be positive. I'm giving myself a few days to grieve. Then, eventually I'll get up and try again.

Don't Use the Piano Room as a Bedroom

That was weird. The Stake Presidency just came by my house and wanted to know if they could visit for 5 minutes. I said sure, and invited them into what should be the only clean room in the house. The one room that's only big enough for the piano, a couch and a chair and really it's not big enough for that.

No sooner had I invited them in did I have to dig blankets and clothes off the floor, along with used tissues, socks and books. I had forgotten. My husband has been using this room as his bedroom for the last week. I remember walking by it today while I was home from one job, getting ready to go to the next one, thinking I should pick all that stuff up. But, the thought just as quickly left my mind. If anyone came over I'd have time to pick it up first, right? Wrong.

All three members of the Stake presidency stood there in that room while I hauled everything out in nearly one full swoop and threw it on the stairs as if the room were all clean now. Who was more embarrassed? Them or me?

I'm still not sure why they stopped by. I guess it's so that I know that the Lord is aware of me and my needs. But, I already knew that.

Something Good Out of Something Bad

We got home from visiting Courtney the other day and found that we had left the bread open while we were gone. I was immediately disappointed by the thought of stale bread.
The kids knew I was disappointed, but Collin didn't take long to say,

"Oh, well. You can make french toast with it."
Me: "Oh, that's a great idea. I didn't think of that, but I like the way you're thinking."
Collin: "Well, ya' know, mom, you can always make something good out of something bad."

This thought had me baffled really, because I immediately thought of more than just bread.
Me: "When did you become so wise?"
Collin: "I read it in a book somewhere, but I'm pretty sure it's true."

I did make french toast the next day and it was great! I'll be making french toast out of my life for awhile, I think.

While I Try to Figure Out How to Be Grown Up

Just an update. I taught 2nd grade on Tuesday--exhausting.

I taught 5th grade on Wed--surprisingly fun. I especially liked when the class went to computers for an hour and I read my book. Lame, but true. I also liked the way these kids ran their own classroom, everyone knowing their job and performing fantastically. This teacher has these kids well-trained. Managing a classroom is an art I tell you! When I substitute teach in the really well run classrooms, I start to think, "I could do this for real." The other days when I'm in a classroom that is run more like I would do it, (a little disorganized and overwhelming) not so much!

Thursday I taught 7-9th grade German. Haha. I don't speak any German but I know how to put a video in. And I enjoyed reading my book some more.

Friday, German again, only this time in the high school. A different video, not nearly as entertaining. Some question exists about my ability to run the DVD player. I probably shouldn't let people know how lame I am, huh?

Plus, I feel lame for recommending the book I finished that day, Esperanza Rising, by Pam Munoz Ryan. The book was great! The lame thing is that books for 6-8th graders are really right at my level. Plus, the truth is that I found it for the first time in a 4th grade classroom last week. I knew right away it was a story for me when I read the back cover. Esperanza means hope in Spanish. It's the story of how a rich Mexican girl loses all her earthly possessions when her wealthy father dies. It recounts the story of how she learns to become a working girl. Just seemed to fit for me, and I felt hope. If you're not above reading books for teens, I think you'll like it too.

April Fools

My advice for the day:

Don't substitute teach 2nd grade on April Fool's Day. Agh! "There's a spider in your hair." "Wanna see my, bug? April Fools!"

There is some question about my ability to laugh and relax anyway. Getting a bunch of kids to do what their teacher thinks they should, and then being told endlessly that I'm not doing it like their teacher does just about put me over the edge today. Why do I think I should go into teaching?

Last year I frosted that sponge and fed it to my kids. Didn't get around to doing any pranks this year, but it's not too late...

Free swim suit giveaway

One of my favorite blog authors is doing a free swimsuit giveaway.

If you're interested you can enter to win a new Modbe swim suit here. Check it out.

IronMoores Rise Again

Getting ready for the Adventure--100 meter swim, 3 mile bike, 1 mile run

The annual Icebreaker Triathlon in our town was today! I didn't think the
kids would do it this year, but sometime last week
(after our good neighbor fixed the flats on the kids' tires--Thanks Mike)
they started begging me to sign them up.

Doing a race with friends makes it even better!

That's a Happy Face at the Finish line

My Favorite Breanne Quotes During the Race

1. "I'm doing this for fun and for the exercise." Her way of saying, I'm having fun and it doesn't matter if everyone beats me. That was at the beginning of the bike when it was still fun.

2. "Triathlon is a lot harder than I thought." That was when she was trying to get her bike up the hill, and starting to really feel the difficulty of the whole venture.

3. "This is torture." Still, on the hill with her bike. (I had to smile here, because I know this feeling. Couldn't help but wonder if God ever smiles on us like I did her at that moment? Yes, it feels like torture, it won't last forever. Look, how well you're doing? Keep going.)

4. "I should get the trophy for best rib hurter." Early into the run she made this comment. Even though she says it was just for fun, I'm sure a part of her really wanted to be recognized among all the athletes for her efforts. Oh, did she ever have a side ache! In her mind, it must have been the one greater than all others worthy of the prize!

Connor ended up getting a ribbon for 2 place in 8-10 year old age group. Breanne got a ribbon for third in the 7 and unders.

I'm so happy for them. What a fun day!

This Is Right On! Check it out

I think she has a very good point. I wrote an email to Target in hopes that somebody will listen and if enough of us say something maybe somebody will listen.

http://www.mormonmommywars.com/?p=1720

Let Me Just Tell You How NOT to Do It.

Does anyone hate learning this way as much as I do?

It bugs me that I have to learn how to do things by screwing them up. I know intellectually that that's how we learn, but I can still be bugged, can't I?

I also understand that we can learn from others mistakes. If we don't learn from what other people are doing than we'd have to make all the mistakes ourselves, right? Well, let me help you out.

Don't peel and shred potatoes and then leave them overnight in the fridge before cooking them.

Ok, I knew they might turn brown but I sort of thought if I added creamy soup and ham, and then covered them well in the fridge they'd be ok for baking the next day. NO!

If you would like to eat grey-black potatoes than you should do what I did. I can't say I've ever eaten black potatoes before this. Yes, I ate them! In fact, I liked them. Now, if I could have gotten any of my family to taste them I'd have other witnesses. No way. Nobody would touch them.

Anybody have other learning experiences to share with me, so that I don't have to make that mistake either?

I've Been Screaming for a Candy Bar

"Who are you? And what have you done with my mother?" Those are Collin's words last night when I bought ice cream, root beer, and then let each child pick their own candy to eat while we watched a video.

My only excuse for my uncharacteristic behavior? I've been living my life lately like a child.

Not just any child. I've been living like a child who is screaming in the grocery store for a candy bar. And I've been loud, angry, and indignant that I'm not getting what I want. Perhaps if I indulge my children I'll feel less pain. Maybe?

Or...(unrelated to candy)

I've been living like the Jews during the New Testament looking for a "Saviour" but not recognizing him in my midst.

I've been wanting desperately for someone to come and "SAVE" me from all my problems.

Thank goodness, it's times like these that help me remember that Christ IS my personal Saviour who will be with me through all my problems.

Today I felt God's love in my life. It's always there, I just don't always feel it. I felt forgiveness where I'd been carrying anger. I felt gratitude where I'd been holding grudges. And I felt peace instead of the anxiety that's been plaguing me.

"I can do all things in Christ, who strengthenth me."

And so can you when you put your faith in Him.

Candy, root beer, and ice cream are optional.

A conversation with my mom

My mom is here for a few days visiting from TX. We had a conversation the other night that went something like this.

Mom: It's depressing here. We've had some cold days in Texas when it got down in the '50's, but THIS is much colder and more miserable.

Me: Yea, I know it's like 25 degrees out.

Me: But, Mom, the weather isn't that bad here if you really embrace it. I'm finding ways to enjoy being out in the mountains and it's amazing. Like, when I was out snowshoeing. It was awe inspiring. You really have to get out above the inversion where you can enjoy the beauty of it. Immerse yourself in it and it's not so bad.

Mom: I think that's what I've been trying to tell you about your life right now. Stop fighting against everything you hate about it and embrace it.

Me: Hmmm.

I haven't said this to her yet, but...I know you're right mom. Thanks.

So, how can I get working full-time to feel more like snowshoeing up a beautiful mountain and less like getting splashed by cars as they go whizzing by me as I trudge through the streets?

Enlivening

Enlivening. Is that a word? Today I went snowshoeing and the only word I can come up with to describe it is enlivening. Ok, I could use words like recharged, one with nature, awakened, and they each nearly describe my experience in the mountains today. But the word I like best to describe how I felt at the top of the crest, is enlivened.

Why? Because I've been struggling. This week several times I've burst into tears in the middle of the day and I have to talk myself into getting it together again. Sometimes I have a few days like this in a row. For whatever reason, I struggle right now with just about everything about my life. Yes, my horrible hormones play a role. Yes, I know we have to endure hard things to become stronger. Yes, I know some people have lives with worries much greater than mine. But...this week I felt like I'm struggling to survive. I'm guessing you've had days or weeks like this too. Many of you know what it's like to ache, and worry and struggle with painful emotions. I know you do.

Well, I'm giving you permission (as if you needed my permission) to do something that will ENLIVEN you. I don't know what your thing is, but you probably do. And if you don't know what your thing is, I'll recommend mine.

Go out in nature, get your blood pumping, talk to a friend and enjoy the beauty around you, because you know what...being alive and enjoying it feels great!

Mom's Favorite Things

I've never been to Time Out for Women, but I'm pretty sure I would like it.

This is part of a clip from Hillary weeks performance. A mom's favorite things. Click here.

Enjoy!

Sharing a Link

Just want to share a link to a post that was recently emailed to me.

Small and Simple Things is the name of the blog.

I want to share it with all. Some of you are going through hard times too. Regardless of your circumstance I think you'll like the reminder and the hope that this author shares.